After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
