I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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