It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
