we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
