remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
she looked like the before picture.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
