Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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