god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
