I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize