Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
