This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize