Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Randomize
