Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
