Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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