Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
This is not my ceiling
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
