Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize