i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
