just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
