Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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