This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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