Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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