I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
