Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
