OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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