She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
