New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize