Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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