So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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