Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize
