You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
