sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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