Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize