i may or may not be watching the land before time
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
