the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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