she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Randomize