Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize