I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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