so explain again why im purple
no
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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