hell yes lets make some ravioli
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize