her vagine was all disorganized.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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