What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize