Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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