Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
