i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
