Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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