I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Randomize
