yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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