I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Randomize
