Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
