I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
