Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
