awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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