Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
