Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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